Masa tuh umor 15 belas tahun. Masih sekolah dalam tingkatan 3. Masih muda remaja. Baru jek nak mengenal dunia.
My friend asked me," Ko rase ape yang ko buat 10 tahun akan datang?". "Hmmmm....mmmmmm.... (berpikir panjang). 10 tahun akan datang? skang umor 15. 10 tahun akan datang umor dah 25. WOH!!! Tua gile dowh!! Hmmmm... aku rase masa tuh aku dah kawin kot. Ye la umor dah banyak kan. Dah kerje, dah ada umah, ada kete and paling penting husband and baby yang chomel. hehehe... Tapi macam lambat lagi jek kan. 10 tahun lame lgi tuh. Xleh imagine cmner aku 10 tahun lagi. Macam berzaman lagi jek."
Owwhhhh boy, how I was so wrong. 10 years fly just like that. And now I've passed the age 25, I'm going to be 26 this coming August. Did I checked any of my angan-angan? nope... nothing. Uh...I already bought a car, so checked that. else, langsung xde. hahahaha... I am laughing at the me 10 years ago. Besar sunggoh angan-angan itu.
Tapi 10 tahun dulu, itu semua doesn't seems too impossible. Looking at it now, hhahahaha... I just say, watever happens, happens. Like my Daddy loooves to say, it's alllllllll written. Watever you do, say and anything at all was already planned. So accept it with an open heart. There's always a reason behind everything, right?
Who would've thought that I am what I am right now? That I am actually alone in my living room writing this. That I just cooked ayam rendang untok makan sahur (10 years ago, I only how to cook megi!). That I actually know how to cook stuff. Woh!... That I am continuing my study. Never in a million years that ever did I thought I can actually get a scholarship. And even bought a car with that money. hahahaha....
We dream about a lot of things. I wanted to be doctor. I wanted to study overseas. I wanted to have an income of 20k pm. I wanted a lot of things. But I'm so glad I didn't get what I wanted. To study to be a doctor is hell. And I know me. First sem jek mesti kantoi la. hahaha... UK was not as nice as people say. I've been there. In Autumn. It's freaking Autumn, and I can't stand the cold! Imagine winter. I couldn't sleep. My nose feels like it's coming off my face. I'm so thankful I didn't go anywhere, but just staying in Malaysia. Saya sayang kepanasan Malaysia. Lepas balik jek dari UK hari tuh, I sun bathed. Rindu sangat rase panas. huh...
About wanting salary of 20k pm, huh, that is just ridiculous! what do you want to do with that lot of money? spend it? spend for what? What cost that much of money? Now, having my own gaji, I do realise we don't need a lot of money to live. Enough is just enough. We only live once, why bother spending 40 years of your living life, to collect that much of money and then die? might as well enjoy it while you still can. You work your butt off, to pay for a house that you only use to sleep (well, you are working 9-5. Pergi keje kol 7 pagi baik lak kol 8 malam). 25 years of mortgage, and you finish paying, you die. hhhaha... So chill. Relax and enjoy every single breath you take.
What I'm trying to say is, Life is just unexpected. 10 years. 10 years is along time. Lots have happened. Some are just unthinkable. My mom esp. huhuhuhuhu.... Who would've thought?? tapi bila masa nye dah tiba, ia tiba. Tidak sesaat cepat, tidak sesaat lambat. Kene lah terima seadanya, kan.
Kenapa saya tulis nih semua. Sebab perasan mostly young couples kat sini, semua nya kol 6 pagi dah xde kat rumah dah. Dah start pergi keje. Kol 10 diorg balik. Makan tapau dari kedai luar. Mesti dah ini rutin diorang hari2 kan. Saya xnak jadi cmnih. Saya nak luang masa untuk famili. Saya nak masak untuk mereka. Saya nak jadi macam mak saya. Yang sentiasa ada masa untok famili. Saya xnak anak2 saya jumpa saya hanya pada hujung minggu.
but yet again, kita cuma merancang....
(Dah beli bahan2 nak buat rendang, balik rumah then realise I don't have any blender! hahahaha.... balik rumah bapak jap semata2 untok guna blender.)
Istighasah, boleh ke tak?
2 days ago